9/17 You're sick of sulking in between the
walls of your apartment. Tell yourself it is time to get
out and meet a rebound man. Desire a quick screw to get
your mind off yet another bad relationship. Go to a bar
you've never been to. You're attracted by the promise
of '80s music and can ignore the fact that there is a girl shooting
up in the corner. If no men are decent at least Billy
Idol and the Go-Go's will soothe your soul. Spot a blond
cutie, smooth on the dance floor, melting and swaying under
the colored lights.
yells to you, "You're an incredible dancer!"
coyly. "You too." Notice he has a cleft
chin, your favorite male attribute, and secretly think he's
a perfect guy to have a short-term fling with. Find out
his name is Ethan.
got his place for an after-bars party, drink a beer, meet his
friends. Watch him talk to these strangers. Think
he's hot. Too short? Can't decide yet. Find
out he owns a few buildings downtown. Think this is great.
No more actors for you. They are never honest. Plan
to see him again.
Ethan and you play mini golf. He says you can go first.
This is sweet. You get a hole in one first off.
hits his ball into the river by mistake on the second hole.
laugh, call him a dork.
He wrinkles his nose at you. "Well, then you're an
even bigger dork, cuz you're with me!"
climbs over the little rope fence around "the green"
and leans over the river to reach his ball. Falls in.
Wet up to his knees, his pants are stained blue by the dye in
the water. You both laugh. Yeah, he's sweet.
It's okay that he's short. He'll be the shortest man you've
ever had sex with.
Watch a sad move at Ethan's house about a woman who is dying
of cancer. Afterward he says he doesn't want to get old
and die. Notice his eyes are a little red and glassy.
This is just sentimental enough for you to sleep with him tonight.
he takes you home in his white Nissan Sentra. Walks you
to the door. Runs his fingers through your chestnut hair
and kisses you goodnight. Soft and slow, but no real spit
exchanged. Figure he's playing "the good boy."
says, "Sorry I can't stay, Beautiful. Have to take
my dog, Muffin, to the vet bright and early." Next
version available in the 2003 edition of Harbinger.