by Elana Jones
Have you ever had to wonder if your boyfriend was cheating on you? Not the best feeling in the world, huh? Has he been hiding his text messages away from you now, instead of texting in front of you? Or has he just not been feeling you lately? Sometimes it is hard to determine when your boyfriend is actually cheating on you. They like to think that they live in these perfect little worlds where everything they do wrong is justified by saying “it’s not like that.” I hate to be the one to break the news to you but, IT’S LIKE THAT. If you have to question it or think twice about something, IT’S LIKE THAT. Need to know how to actually catch him cheating? I am your answer. I can help you with that; you just have to be patient and be willing to accept the fact that your boyfriend is cheating on you. Once you have agreed, there is no turning back!
Before we begin this process ask yourself these questions:
- Has your boyfriend ever cheated on you before?
- Does your boyfriend happen to have a “best friend” of the opposite sex whom you do not approve of?
- Has your boyfriend ever lied to you about something small?
- Has your boyfriend ever had to answer a call in a different room?
- Does your boyfriend have a lock on his phone?
If you answered yes to all of these questions, know that you have yourself an interesting situation. It’s okay though. Your problem can be solved.
How To Identify Cheating
Some girls just do not know when their boyfriend is cheating. Many hints are given, but you have to be able to catch them. For instance, if your boyfriend starts to leave his phone in his room because it is “charging”, take mental note of that and see how often that occurs. Sometimes it could be “charging”, but then again it could also be that he left his cell phone in his room so that he won’t get caught slipping (cheating). If this is your situation you have two options. You can either: a) Let him keep doing that, but while he thinks he is being slick, you have to have another plan in motion, or b) Be bold and just ask his ass why he can’t charge his phone in the same room. Now, if you chose option A, you HAVE to take mental note of how often he is “charging” his phone. Once you observe, the next step is generating a plan on how to catch him slipping. My favorite one is pull something so slick that he won’t even see it coming. Ladies, you have to be bold! One day when your boyfriend is in the bathroom, taking a nap, or is just dumb enough to leave his phone around you while he is off doing something else, find out for yourself. If you are one of those girls who do not want to accept what you find out, this step is just not for you. But if you are not that kind of girl, go for it! You have to be swift and slick about it though. DO NOT GET CAUGHT GOING THROUGH HIS PHONE!
At this point I know your heart may be pounding so hard you think you can you can hear your pulse in your ears or, your hands are starting to sweat so much you think you may drop the phone once you start to snoop. Well I am here to tell you to FOCUS! Shut up crying and focus. You don’t have time to waste, girl! Now dry your sweaty hands off and get to it. Turn on his phone and quickly go to his messages. Once you get to his messages you can only skim through them. Look for names that you do not know or even numbers that are not saved. Click on one. QUICKLY skim through the message; if you don’t see anything there, move to another one. Hurry! Be fast. Something has to be there. Wait! Skip over that name, but click on the next one. Yes, that one. Read the messages this time, but you still have to be speedy. I’ll give you a moment to do that.
Now that you have read a message that you do not approve of as a girlfriend, DO NOT SHOW that on your face. You have to play it cool until I tell you to. Once your boyfriend comes back into the room, act normal. If you show him that something is bothering you, he is going to ask you and IT IS NOT TIME TO BREAK IT TO HIM YET. What you can do is convince him to take you to get some ice cream. The best way is to tell him that you’re going to pay for it this time. (I don’t know why boys do that! The boys should be paying for the girls at all times!) Anyways, go get in the car and hold his hand the whole way there. After the ice cream is handed to both of you and you take about two bites of your ice cream, say “Baby, I need to ask you something, but you have to be honest with me okay?” He will respond not thinking anything about who he has been texting while you were not around, so break it to him! “Who is __________ (fill in the blank) and why have you been talking to her about ______________?” First, he’s going to play stupid and pretend he doesn’t know who you are talking about. This is when you get REAL serious by showing him your true feelings. Say “ Boy, don’t play with me. You know who the hell I’m talkin’ about. Do you need me to show you who I’m talkin’ about?” Now he’s going to be all choked up about this question. He’s probably wondering why all of a sudden did you ask him this, but let him answer. If he doesn’t give you a straightforward answer right then and there, slap his ass to let him know that you are not playing! Sometimes you have to get physical with these men so they will know better! If he is still playing like he doesn’t know who you are talking about, when you get back to his house show him who you are talking about. But, if he confesses and tells you, then I’m sure you can handle it from here. Although my favorite thing to do is to show him that you are hurt, get your belongings and go home. If he chases after you, he knows what he has done wasn’t right, but if he doesn’t chase after you, girl, you better leave his ass where you found him and never talk to him again.
If He Chases You Out The Door
If your boyfriend chases you out the door when you are headed to your car, DO NOT GIVE IN! You have to stand your ground and let him know that you are going home, because you cannot stand to look at him right now. Do not give him any hugs nor kisses good-bye, just get in your car and go home. Once you are home, he is going to call you and text you so many times that it will probably get annoying, but the main goal is not to give in. Do not answer his calls. Do not answer his text messages. If you really want to see how he is feeling, go to his Twitter page and read his tweets. All your answers should be right there.
I said go home because it gives you your own space to think about the situation and realize some things. Some people think a little bit too deep and ask themselves a million and one questions. NO! This is not the time for that. Just think about what the messages said, but also try to figure out why he was talking to her. Maybe you need to reevaluate yourself and your relationship. That is okay. It is only for the better. While you are thinking, your ice cream is supposed to be your comfort. Eat it. All of it. Do not cry, though. Most of the men in our lives go through this stage, when they think they “can have their cake and eat it too”, but you have to be one of those girls who shows him that you are worth more than that, nothing less.